party time.

It's a musical day.

I stayed up far too late last night, though I don't entirely blame myself. Since I'm going out tonight, I should probably nap. Now. Soon. Whichever.
Everyone is dressing up to go to a house party? I plan on wearing jeans and a sweater. It's a little sickening to go with a group of people who look perfect and impeccable and wear nice tops and dresses without ruining them at a party.
Curse my eternal clumsiness (and bad luck).

In other news, I may not be seeing Jack's Mannequin at all this year.
I'm crying on the inside.

sad.

Gosh, keeping up three blogs is a full-time job. I'm exhausted.

I'm listening to the Perishers, which might signal the kind of mood I'm in. Sad, careless, unwanted. Though hopeful, I suppose. It's just one of those nights.

But I'm talking to one of my best friends from home, who I haven't had a chance to connect with for a long time. It's nice to remember each other's idiosyncrasies and everything. I miss her.

*sigh*
I need a boy. Or a best friend.
Both would be great.

prodigal son.

I decided I should try and take this blog back up again.
See, in this long extended time off some call a "hiatus," I created another blog: taylorrness.wordpress.com. (check it out, if you want.) It's fancier. Anyway. I am a fairly regular poster over there, so I neglected this one and all of the wonderful people who read it.
Well, not anymore. I am back.

So, what have you all been up to? Let me know!

randomness.

i haven't posted on here in a while.
i think it's because i find the need to throw random emotions into my words and call it something.
anything.
and that makes no sense at all, so let's move on.

i just need to go home.
it's all i can think about, all i want, to the point of considering not doing my exams.
i miss everything.



i fought with my mom today.
she doesn't understand how it feels to be miles away and still have responsibilities to the people i left behind.

i hate it.

almonds.

tonight i saw a play about melancholy.
it was strange, but there was a line that caught me.

"we seem as as far apart as the space between stars."

they say that melancholy tastes of bitter almonds.

hello, again.

wow.
i have been neglecting this like nothing else.
i suppose i should make a conscious effort to write at least once a day. which is a conscious effort i make approx. every week. oh well.

first order of business: i got a new camera!!!!
it's a canon rebel xt, and i love it! it's all shiny with a zoom lens and strap and leather bag.
though it does come with some fears. this photography class is my favorite one, and while the teacher scares me to death, i adore her and respect her as a professor. but for our previous assignments, when they all came out blurry or full of noise or not sharp enough, i blamed my camera. but now, i have a good one--was the problem really my camera, or am i a terrible photographer? i look at other peoples' pictures and feel incredibly inadequate. i have studied all of the technical stuff and got an A- on my midterm, something i'm proud of. but will it be enough?

i spent the day listening to so much music.
currently addicted to last.fm. username is taylorrness, if anyone wants to add me on there.

song i can't get enough of: polaris - jimmy eat world.

good night.

pink bullets.

i've loved this song for a long, long time.
the line "the years have been short, but the days were long" always meant something right around graduation time, both for middle school and high school. (the fact that i listened to the shins in eighth grade still boggles my mind.)
so. lyrics.

-----

I was just bony hands as cold as a winter pole
You held a warm stone out new flowing blood to hold
Oh what a contrast you were
To the brutes in the halls
My timid young fingers held a decent animal.

Over the ramparts you tossed
The scent of your skin and some foreign flowers
Tied to a brick
Sweet as a song
The years have been short but the days were long.

Cool of a temperate breeze from dark skies to wet grass
We fell in a field it seems now a thousand summers passed
When our kite lines first crossed
We tied them into knots
And to finally fly apart
We had to cut them off.

Since then it's been a book you read in reverse
So you understand less as the pages turn
Or a movie so crass
And awkardly cast
That even I could be the star.

I don't look back as much as a rule
And all this way before murder was cool
But your memory is here and I'd like it to stay
Warm light on a winter day.

Over the ramparts you tossed
The scent of your skin and some foreign flowers
Tied to a brick
Sweet as a song
The years have been short but the days go slowly by
Two loose kites falling from the sky
Drawn to the ground and an end to flight.